Ch ch ch changes

Changes are coming. Now that I am currently working night shifts, I will have a bit more time to write. Whilst my mind has been a bit blank, ideas are starting to pour out. I’m going to push it to more of an art and silly story blog. But have no fear, the stories are just every day encounters I will have. Not as funny as some, but they’ll be there. I do come across randomness.

Also, I want to work on short stories with people. If you want to participate, please let me know. I love doing collaborations.

25 Will Never Get Old

Day 25. Wow, we made it to day 25. Today I’m to tell you about a song that I could listen to all day and not get sick of.

This one can be any number of songs. I can listen to a lot of songs and never be tired of them, but today, one particular one comes to mind. I love drum and bass. I can listen to it non stop and not get sick of it. Why? It keeps you moving non stop and makes everything go faster. I’ve listened to it cleaning, painting, sketching, playing video games, and just about anything else. I want to share one of my favorite ones with you to send you off with a bang here.

Day 12 – Last Song I Heard

On this day 12 of 25 song challenge, I am to tell you what the last song I heard was.

I listen to music nonstop. I always have my playlist changing and growing. In fact, I usually don’t show my Spotify updates so I don’t annoy everyone with the songs going every few minutes. And as you have seen, I have a variety of music that I listen to. So, what was the last thing I heard?

Spotify tells me that the last song I heard was:

I am certain of this because I’ve been gaming and cleaning today, so it’s halfway through the song that I was listening to whilst on my way back to the apartment. The TV has been on since then, so there has been no other music. Why was I listening to this? Duh, it was on the playlist and shuffle mode said it shall be on. I cannot argue with that.

Real or Fake?

So cruising around on my facebook today, I saw the below picture:

RealvsFake

and it really got me thinking. Real vs Fake. Most of the comments that I saw, were saying how they loved the “fake” version, the painting. Myself, I was automatically drawn to the photograph that the painting was modeled from. That is what is real.

And this leads me to a new line of thought. Are people always drawn to what they want to see instead of what is real?

Is this created from the media, envy, or what?

What do you think? Real, or fake? Why?

I choose real because to me, the beauty is in what we behold and know is truth, not what we are directed to think is “perfect”.

Changes!

I’ve decided that since my life has been changing, I don’t need to put out hard hitting posts about depression. That’s not who I am. I just want to make sure I’m posting. I want to share what is going on in my days. If it’s that I just danced through the grocery store, then I’ll post it. Or perhaps I took photos on my walk to work of the first snow fall. Or maybe I’m entering a costume contest at the Comic Con. I want to write about those things.
Ok, so some of you may get a double dose as there may be some facebook repeats, but that’s ok. I’m writing, and it’s what I want to do. Things will be different, but that’s good. Change is good, and being different, well that is what is truly me.

Enjoy and embrace, because this is me!

Acceptance and Blessings

So it has been a while. Things have definitely been busy and crazy, but despite the hardships, I feel blessed.

I’ve met the most amazing and caring person. Not to mention incredibly sexy. (He says no, but I disagree. Though when he says the same to me, I say no as well.)  He’s helped me by just being who he is. He knows who he is and is comfortable with who he has become. He accepts me for who I am, this includes my past. He embraces it, stating it has created me into who I am now, and that is who he loves.

Knowing this, and feeling this love and acceptance, I’ve been able to heal. It’s more of a total healing. I’ve been able to accept myself.  I know, who would have thought this would happen. I never did, but it’s amazing. I really am healing. I am finding my true self, and accepting who I am. When I say accepting, I mean it not in a “Oh that’s just who I am type of way, and it won’t change”, no not that, I’m realizing who I am, what makes me, and embracing it.

That’s right. Embracing who I am and what makes me who I am.

I’m also learning to trust. After everything I have gone through, I’m learning trust, something I thought was gone and would never come back. I won’t lie and say it is easy, because it’s not. Not a chance in the world of that being easy. It’s a constant battle. It’s so engrained into me to be negative and to feel that nothing will work out, but I’m learning to trust. My boyfriend is the best thing to happen to me and helping me with trust. I’m experiencing reasons to trust, and then having these feelings reinforced. I’m not going to say I have this down, and I know what I’m doing. I need reminders. I need help.  But here’s the point, I’m learning and building. I have a reason to trust. Everyone else in my life has shown me that trust is something that cannot be had, now, I know differently.

Kind of nice isn’t it?

Oh… I’ve changed a bit.  There are some pink chunks to my hair, and I now have my symbol on my wrists. My sparrows are with  me where I can see them always. My strength. They’re there whenever I need a reminder. I’m here, and I’m standing stronger. Little by little.

 

A little pink...

A little pink…

My strength, my reminders, my symbols.

My strength, my reminders, my symbols.